Balsamic-Grilled Portobello & Roasted Pepper Salad
I love airplanes. Yes, I know they're germ-filled and cramped and usually there's a baby screaming, but I still love them. I love the fact that when I'm in one, I'm en route somewhere (which to me is always exciting, no matter where the destination). But mostly I just love having a block of uninterrupted time. No cleaning, no errand-running, no meetings, no distractions: just time alone with my thoughts. I used to use my airplane time exclusively for reading (magazines, books, you name it) and journaling, but now I actually love working on the plane. It feels so good to get caught up – on emails, on blog posts, on recipe-editing, on planning. (Case in point: I wrote most of this blog post on a plane!)
Life lately has felt a little out-of-control. So many projects going all at once, and project management is NOT my strong point. I've got loads of creativity and ideas, but the execution at times can feel a little overwhelming. Everything just keeps piling up: clothes, emails, dishes, the to-do list... I feel like the second I'm kind of caught up in one category, other things start piling up. (So if I haven't emailed you back - please forgive me! I will!! Soon!!) The funny thing is, even though I'll never have a Pinterest-worthy (i.e. clutter-free) home, and I'll never be that woman that wakes up at 5 to work out, and I'll never host dinner parties that actually start on time – I put immense amounts of pressure on myself to be a total over-achiever in every aspect of life. Which means, I'm constantly letting myself down.
I recently went back and re-read a post I wrote a year ago about perfection. It made me realize how easily it is to fall back into old patterns of berating myself for my shortcomings, and comparing myself to others. How I long to be that confident woman in the post, who accepts herself for who she really is, in all of her messy glory. I'm not sure why it's so hard for me to accept my complete self - the good, the bad, and the ugly. I so wish I could show the same grace to myself that I show to others.
But nothing happens by accident, so it's time to get intentional. And it's never late for a new beginning. (Grace, right?!) I'm going to share the intentions that I set last year, and hopefully you all will join me in trying to keep these as well. Because I have a feeling I'm not the only one who struggles with feelings of insecurity. Instead of relentlessly comparing ourselves to each other, let's try and support each others' uniqueness. Let's celebrate our own stories, and stop trying to pretend that perfection is possible (or desirable). With no further ado, here my new (old) intentions:
*I am done comparing myself to others. I am unique exactly as God created me, and I will celebrate who I am, as well as the gifts and talents of others.
*I am done striving for a standard of “perfection” that doesn’t actually exist. I will focus my energy on being thankful for what I have, rather than being jealous of what others have.
*I am done berating myself for not being a better wife, friend, sister, daughter, writer, blogger, cook, (the list could go on…). I will extend grace to myself, and in doing so, will better be able to extend grace to others.
*I am done feeling guilty for all the things I “should have done” or “should be doing.” I will leave the past in the past, and focus on living today to the fullest. My identity is not in what I do, but rather in who I am becoming.
*I am done living in fear – fear of disappointing others, fear of failure, fear of rejection. I will live in the freedom I’ve been given.
*I am done acting out of obligation. I will follow my heart and pursue my calling with joy!
I am literally going to tape this list to my bathroom mirror, paste it on my kitchen cabinet, and beside my computer. Because I am sick of being so hard on myself. I'm ready for a new beginning.
Have a great weekend everyone, and I hope you enjoy the salad below! It's a perfect vegetarian main course, with the meaty grilled portobellos, or as a delicious side with grilled chicken or steak.
Photos by Signe Birck[recipe:best-balsamic-grilled-portobello-mushroom-roasted-pepper-salad-recipe]